英语小笑话带翻译简单
英语小笑话带翻译简单 英语小笑话带翻译简单一： I Have His Ear in My Pocket Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked, "What happened?" "A kid bit me," replied Ivan. "Would you recognize him if you saw him again?" asked his mother. "I’d know him anywhere," said Ivan. "I have his ear in my pocket." 他的耳朵在我的衣兜里 伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里。他妈妈问,"发生了什么事?“ ”一个男孩咬了我一口，“伊凡说。 ”再见到他时你能认出来吗?"妈妈问。 “他走到哪里我都能认出他，”伊凡说，“他的`耳朵还在我的衣兜里呢。” NOTE recognize v.认出 realize v.认识到(某种事实等) 英语小笑话带翻译简单二： The Climate of New Zealand Teacher: Matthew, what is the climate of New Zealand? Matthew: Very Cold, sir. Teacher: Wrong. Matthew: But, sir! When they send us meat it always arrives frozen! 新西兰的气候 老师：马修，新西兰的气候怎么样? 马修：先生，那里的天气很冷。 老师：错了。 马修：可是，先生!从那儿运来的猪肉都冻得硬邦邦的。 NOTE frozen adj. freeze 的过去分词 冰冻的, 冻僵的, 冻伤的 [美](事实真理等)不可推翻的 英语小笑话带翻译简单三： The Fourth Element Teacher: What are the four element of nature? Student: Fire, air, earth, and... and ... Teacher: And what? Just think it over, what do you wash your hands with? Student: Soap! 第四元素 老师：自然界的四大元素是什么? 学生：火、气、和。。。和。。。 老师：和什么?想一想， 你用什么洗手的? 学生：肥皂。 ;
英语小笑话带翻译简短
笑话：推荐信 Letter of RecommendationWhen Peters learned that he was being fired, he went to see the head of humanresources. "Since I've been with the firm for so long," he said, "I think I deserve at least a letter ofrecommendation."The human resources director agreed and said he'd have the letter the next day. Thefollowing morning, Peters found a letter on his desk. It read, "Jonathan Peters worked for our company for 11 years. When he left us, we were very satisfied."彼得斯听说自己被解雇了，便去见人力资源部的头头。“既然我在公司千了这么久，说，〝我想至少该给我一封推荐信。人力资源部主任同忘了，并说他第二天就可拿到该信。第二天早上，彼得斯在他的桌子上看—封信，上面与道：“乔纳森-彼得斯在我们公司千了11年。当他离去的时候，我们很满意。“
超好笑的英语笑话有翻译
超好笑的英语笑话有翻译（通用11篇） 笑话是一个汉语词汇，拼音是xiào hua，意思是引人发笑的话或事情。笑话具有篇幅短小，故事情节简单而巧妙，往往出人意料，给人突然之间笑神来了的奇妙感觉的特点。下面是我整理的超好笑的英语笑话有翻译相关内容。 超好笑的英语笑话有翻译 篇1 Once upon a time the colors of the world started to quarrel.All claimed that they were the best. Green said: Clearly I am the most important.I am the sign of life and of hope.I was chosen for grass,trees and leaves.Look over the countryside and you will see that I am in the majority. Blue interrupted: You only think about the earth,but consider the sky and the sea.It is the water that is the basis of life.The sky gives space and peace and serenity.Without my peace,you would all be nothing.” Yellow chuckled: The sun is yellow,the moon is yellow,the stars are yellow.Every time you look at a sunflower,the whole world starts to smile.Without me there would be no fun. Orange started next: I carry the most important vitamins.Think of carrots,oranges and mangoes.When I fill the sky at sunrise or sunset,my beauty is so striking that no one gives another thought to any of you. Red could stand it no longer so he shouted out: I am the ruler of all of you.I am blood一 life's blood! I bring fire into the blood.I am the color of passion and love. Purple was very tall and spoke with great pomp: I am the color of royalty and power.Kings,chiefs and bishops have always chosen me for I am the sign of authority and wisdom.People do not question me! They listen and obey. Finally Indigo spoke,much more quietly than all the others,but with just as much determination: Think of me.I am the color of silence.I represent thought and reflection,twilight and deep water.You need me for balance and contrast,for prayer and inner peace. And so the colors went on quarreling,each convinced of his or her own superiority.Suddenly there was a startling flash of bright lightening,and thunder rolled.Rain started to pour down. Rain began to speak: You foolish colors.Don't you know that you were each made for a special purpose? Join hands with one another and come to me. Doing as they were told,the colors joined hands and united. Rain continued: From now on,when it rains,each of you will stretch across the sky in a great bow of color as a reminder that you can all live in peace.The rainbow is a sign of hope for tomorrow. 有一天，世界上的五颜六色彼此争吵了起来，每一个颜色都声称自己是最好的。 绿色说：“很明显嘛!我就是最重要的。我是生命和希望的象征。青草、大树和叶子都选择我，只要往乡野望去，我就是主色。” 蓝色打断他的话说：“你只想到地面，想想天空和海洋吧!水是生命之源，而天空包容大地、宁静和祥和。一旦失去我的宁静祥和，你们就什么也不是了。” 黄色暗自好笑：“太阳是黄色的，月亮是黄色的，星星也是黄色的。每当你看着向日葵，整个世界也跟着笑逐言开起来。没有了我，也就没有了乐趣。” 橙色接着说：“我是最重要的维他命，想想胡萝卜、橘子和芒果。每当日出日落时，我就满布在天空，我的美丽如此令人惊艳，根本不会有人想到你们。” 红色再也按捺不住，他大声的说：“我是你们的主宰，我是血!生命之血!我将热情注入血液，我是热情和爱情的颜色。” 紫色自视甚高，而且盛气凌人的说：“我是皇室和权威的颜色，国王、领袖和大主教都选择我，因为我是权威和智慧的象征。人们不敢对我有所存疑，只有乖乖听命的份。” 靛色终于说话了，比起其它颜色，他的声音平和多了，但是，也是同样的斩钉截铁：“我是宁静之声，我代表思想、深思熟虑、曙光以及深水。你们需要我来平衡对比、祈祷并获得内在的平静。” 五言六色就这样一直吵下去，每个颜色都认为自己最优秀。突然间闪电雷鸣大作，大雨倾盆而下。 雨开口说话：“你们这些蠢颜色，你们不晓得自己各有所司吗?大家手牵手一起过来。” 那些颜色都乖乖的手牵手，站在一起。 雨接着说：“从今以后，只要一下雨，你们每个都得伸展成大弓形横跨在天际，藉以提醒大家和平共处。因为彩虹是明日希望的象征。” 超好笑的英语笑话有翻译 篇2 One day a visitor from the city came to a small rural area to drive around the country roads,see how the farms looked,and perhaps to see how farmers earned their living.The city man saw a farmer in his yard,holding a pig up in his hands,and lifting it so that the pig could eat apples from an apple tree.The city man said to the farmer," I see that your pig likes apples,but isn"t that quite a waste of time?" The farmer replied," What"s time to a pig?" 一天，有一个城市里的游客来到一个小乡村，在乡间路上开着车，想看看农庄是什么样子，也想看看农夫怎样种田过日子。这位城里人看见一位农夫在宅后的草地 上，手中抱着一头猪，并把它举得高高的，好让它能够吃到树上的苹果。城里人对农夫说，"我看你的猪挺喜欢吃苹果的，但是，这不是很浪费时间吗?"那位农夫 回答说，"时间对猪有什么意义?" 超好笑的英语笑话有翻译 篇3 I`ve Just Bitten My Tongue "Are we poisonous?" the young snake asked his mother. "Yes,dear," she replied."Why do you ask?" "Because I`ve just bitten my tongue!" 我刚咬了自己的舌头 “我们有毒吗?”一条年幼的蛇问它的妈妈。 “是的，亲爱的，”她回答说，“你问这个干什么?” “因为我刚刚咬了自己的舌头!” 超好笑的英语笑话有翻译 篇4 Three turtles decided to have a cup of coffee. 三只乌龟决定去喝咖啡。 Just as they got into the cafe,it started to rain. 它们刚到咖啡店的门口，就下起雨来。 The biggest turtle said to the smallest one," Go home and get the umbrella." 于是最大的那只乌龟对最小的乌龟说，“你回家去取伞吧。” The little turtle replied,"I will,if you don't drink my offee." 最小的乌龟说，“如果你们不把我的'咖啡喝了，我就去。” "We won't," the other two promised. “我们不喝，”另外两只乌龟答应说。 Two years later the big turtle said to the middle turtle,"Well,I guess he isn't coming back,so we might as well drink his coffee." 两年后，大乌龟对中乌龟说，“好吧，我猜他肯定不回来了，我们可以把它的咖啡喝掉了。” Just then a voice called from outside the door,"If you do,I won't go." 正在这时，一个声音从门外传来，“你们要是喝了，我就不去。” 超好笑的英语笑话有翻译 篇5 "So you want another day off,”snorted the teacher to his student，Tom.“I am anxious to hear what excuse you have this time.You have been off for your grandfather's funeral four times already.” “这么说，你又要请一天假，”老师怒气冲冲地对他的学生汤姆说，“我倒想知道你这次找什么借口。你已经请了四次假说去参加你爷爷的葬礼。” Tom replied，"Today my grandma is getting married again.” 汤姆回答说:“今天是我奶奶再次举行婚礼。” 超好笑的英语笑话有翻译 篇6 Midway Tactics Three competing store owners rented adjoining shops in a mall.Observers waited for mayhem to ensue. The retailer on the right put up huge signs saying,"Gigantic Sale!" and "Super Bargains!" The store on the left raised bigger signs proclaiming,"Prices Slashed!" and "Fantastic Discounts!" The owner in the middle then prepared a large sign that simply stated,"ENTRANCE". 中间战术 三个互相争生意的商店老板在一条商业街上租用了毗邻的店铺。旁观者等着瞧好戏。 右边的零售商挂起了巨大的招牌，上书：“大减价!”“特便宜!” 左边的商店挂出了更大的招牌，声称：“大砍价!”“大折扣!” 中间的商人随后准备了一个大招牌，上面只简单地写着：“入口处”。 超好笑的英语笑话有翻译 篇7 Very Pleased to Meet You During World War II,a lot of young women in Britain were in the army.Joan Phillips was one of them.She worked in a big camp,and of course met a lot of men,officers and soldiers. One evening she met Captain Humphreys at a dance.He said to her,"I‘m going abroad tomorrow,but I‘d be very happy if we could write to each other." Joan agreed,and they wrote for several months. Then his letters stopped,but she received one from another officer,telling her that he had been wounded and was in a certain army hospital in England. Joan went there and said to the matron,"I‘ve come to visit Captain Humphreys." "Only relatives are allowed to visit patients here," the matron said. "Oh,that‘s all right," answered Joan."I‘m his sister." "I‘m very pleased to meet you," the matron said,"I‘m his mother!" 在第二次世界大战中，有许多年轻的妇女在军营中服役。琼.飞利浦斯是其中之一。她在一个大军营中工作，当然遇到了许多男士，包括军官和士兵。 一天晚上她在舞会上遇到了军官汉弗雷斯。他对她说，“我明天就要出国，但如果我们能够相互写信，我会很高兴。”琼同意了，于是他们几个月里一直通着信。 后来，他再没有来信。她收到了另一个军官的信，告诉她，他受伤了，住在英格兰的某个部队医院里。 琼到了医院，她对护士长说，“我来看望军官汉弗雷斯。” “这里只有亲属可以探望病人。”护士长说。 “噢，是的，”琼说，“我是他的妹妹。” “很高兴认识你，”护士长说，“我是他的母亲。” 超好笑的英语笑话有翻译 篇8 Two Soldiers Two soldiers were in camp.The first one‘s name was George,and the second one‘s name was Bill.George said,"have you got a piece of paper and an envelope,Bill?" Bill said,"Yes,I have," and he gave them to him. Then George said,"Now I haven‘t got a pen." Bill gave him his,and George wrote his letter.Then he put it in the envelope and said,"have you got a stamp,Bill?" Bill gave him one. Then Bill got up and went to the door,so George said to him,"Are you going out?" Bill Said,"Yes,I am," and he opened the door. George said,"Please put my letter in the box in the office,and..." He stopped. "What do you want now?" Bill said to him. George looked at the envelope of his letter and answered,"What‘s your girl-friend‘s address?" 军营里有二名士兵，一个叫乔治，一个叫比尔。乔治问：“比尔，你有信纸、信封吗?” 比尔说：“有。”然后把信纸和信封给了乔治。 乔治又说：“我还没有笔呢。”比尔又把自己的笔给了他。乔治开始写信。写完后把信放进信封里，又问：“比尔，你有邮票吗?”比尔给了他一张。 这时比尔站起来，向门口走去。乔治问：“你要出去吗?” 比尔说：“是的。”随即打开了门。 乔治说：“请帮我把这封信投进办公室的信箱里，还有...”他停住了。 “你还要什么?”比尔问。 乔治看着信封说：“你女朋友的地址是?” 超好笑的英语笑话有翻译 篇9 Five Months Older The Second World War had begun,and John wanted to join the army,but he was only 16 years old,and boys were allowed to join only if they were over 18.So when the army doctor examined him,he said that he was 18. But John‘s brother had joined the army a few days before,and the same doctor had examined him too.This doctor remembered the older boy‘s family name,so when he saw John‘s papers,he was surprised. "How old are you?" he said. "Eighteen,sir," said John. "But your brother was eighteen,too," said the doctor."Are you twins?" "Oh,no,sir," said John,and his face went red."My brother is five months older than I am." 大五个月 第二次世界大战开始了，约翰想参军，可他只有十六岁，当时规定男孩到十八岁才能入伍。所以军医给他进行体检时，他说他已经十八岁了。 可约翰的哥哥刚入伍没几天，而且也是这个军医给他做的检查。这位医生还记得他哥哥的姓。所以当他看到约翰的表格时，感到非常惊奇。 “你多大了?”军医问。 “十八，长官。”约翰说。 “可你的哥哥也是十八岁，你们是双胞胎吗?” 约翰脸红了，说：“哦，不是，长官，我哥哥比我大五个月。” 超好笑的英语笑话有翻译 篇10 West Point My father,brother and I visited West Point to see a football game between Army and Boston College.Taking a stroll before kickoff,we met many cadets in neatly pressed uniforms.Several visting fans asked the recruits if they would pose for photographs,"to show our son what to expect if he should attend West Point." One middle-aged couple approached a very attractive female cadet and asked her to pose for a picture.They explained,"We want to show our son what he missed by not coming to West Point." 父亲、哥哥和我到西点军校去观看一场陆军与波士顿大学之间的橄榄球赛。开始之前，我们到处转了转，碰到许多穿着整齐制服的学员。几名游客问新兵是否愿意摆出军姿来让他们摄。“好让我们的儿子知道，如果他到西点军校来学习会得到什么。” 一对中年夫妇走近一名非常漂亮的女学员，问她是否愿意摆个姿势照相。他们解释说：“我们想让儿子知道他没来西点军校错过了什么。” 超好笑的英语笑话有翻译 篇11 Present for Girlfriend At a jewelry store,a young man bought an expensive locket as a present for his girlfriend."Shall I engrave her name on it?" the jeweler asked. The customer thought for a moment,and then said,"No-engrave it ‘To my one and only love‘.That way,if we ever break up,I can use it again." 送给女友的礼物 在一家珠宝店里，一位年轻人买了一个贵重的小金盒作为送给女友的礼物。“要我把她的名字刻在上面吗?”珠宝商问道。 那名顾客想了一会儿，然后说道：“不--在上面刻‘给我唯一的爱’。这样，如果我们闹崩了，我还可以再用到它。” ;
简短英语小笑话
简短英语小笑话 简短英语小笑话一： I Wasn't Listening Mother asked her little daughter who was reading a book. "What are you reading, dear?" "I don't know." the little girl answered. "You don't know? But you were reading aloud, so you must know." "I was reading aloud, mummy, but i wasn't listening," explained the child. 简短英语小笑话二： Actual Age The teacher noticed that Johnny had been daydreaming for a long time. She decided to get his attention. "Johnny," she said, "If the world is 25,000 miles around and eggs are sixty cents a dozen, how old am I? "Thirty-four," Johnny answered unhesitatingly. The teacher replied "Well, that's not far from my actual age. Tell me...how did you guess?" "Oh, there's nothing to it," Johnny said. "My big sister is seventeen and she's only half-crazy." 简短英语小笑话三： Goldfish Little Amy was in the garden filling in a hole when her neighbor peered over the fence. Interested in what the cheeky-faced youngster was doing, he politely asked, "What are you up to there, Amy?" "My goldfish died," replied Amy tearfully, without lookingup, "and I've just buried him." The neighbor was concerned, "That's an awfully big hole for a goldfish, isn't it?" Amy patted down the last heap of earth then replied, "That's because he's inside your cat." ;
求简短的英语小笑话
Tommy: How is your little brother, Johnny? Johnny: He is ill in bed. He hurt himself.
Tommy: That's too bad. How did that happen?
Johnny: We played who could lean furthest out of the window, and he won.
他赢了
汤姆：约翰尼，你小弟弟好吗？
约翰尼：他害病卧床了。他受了伤。
汤姆：真糟糕，怎么回事儿？
约翰尼：我们做游戏，看谁能把身子探出窗外最远，他赢了。
I Have His Ear in My Pocket
Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked, "What happened?"
"A kid bit me," replied Ivan.
"Would you recognize him if you saw him again?" asked his mother.
"I'd know him any where," said Ivan. "I have his ear in my pocket."
他的耳朵在我衣兜里
伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里。他妈妈问，“发生了什么事？”
“一个男孩咬了我一口，”伊凡说。
“再见到他你能认出来吗？”妈妈问。
“他走到哪里我都能认出他，”伊凡说。“他的耳朵还在我衣兜里呢。”
A Good Boy
Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"
"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.
"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?"
"She is the one who sells the candy."
好孩子
小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。
“昨天给你的钱干什么了？”
“我给了一个可怜的老太婆，”他回答说。 “你真是个好孩子，”妈妈骄傲地说。“再给你两分钱。可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢？”
“她是个卖糖果的。”
Drunk
One day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, "What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk', dad?" "Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk."
"But, dad," the boy said, " there's only ONE policeman!"
醉酒
一天，父亲与小儿子一道回家。这个孩子正处于那种对什么事都很感兴趣的年龄，老是有提不完的问题。他向父亲发问道：“爸爸，‘醉’字是什么意思？” “唔，孩子，”父亲回答说，“你瞧那儿站着两个警察。如果我把他们看成了四个，那么我就算醉了。” “可是，爸爸， ”孩子说，“那儿只有一个警察呀！”
Hospitality
The hostess apologized to her unexpected guest for serving an apple-pie without any cheese. The little boy of the family left the room quietly for a moment and returned with a piece of cheese which he laid on the guest's plate. The visitor smiled, put the cheese into his mouth and then said: "You must have better eyes than your mother, sonny. Where did you find the cheese?" "In the rat-trap, sir," replied the boy.
好客
由于客人在吃苹果馅饼时，家里没有奶酪了，于是女主人向大家表示歉意。这家的小男孩悄悄地离开了屋子。过了一会儿，他拿着一片奶酪回到房间，把奶酪放在客人的盘子里。 客人微笑着把奶酪放进嘴里说：“孩子，你的眼睛就是比你妈妈的好。你在哪里找到的奶酪？” “在捕鼠夹上，先生。”那小男孩说。
